Adult Situations

This article was written by loudpen

Hey Urbane Readers, it’s LoudPen here to discuss text messaging/email etiquette for relationships.  It has recently come to my attention that text messaging and email is being used in the wrong way for relationships.  I for one, am guilty of using text messaging and email to communicate with males when I should have picked up the phone or waited to have certain discussions in person.

Basically, text messaging and email are excellent forms of communication, but, they can be greatly misconstrued when used in the wrong way.  Take my recent mishap for example:  I recently deleted the number of a guy I liked and when I re-saved what I thought was his number,  I later discovered I mixed him up with another guy.  How did I not realize the mix-up? Simple, I was communicating with him through text messaging only.  There’s nothing wrong with text messaging, because,  it’s an easy way to communicate when you can’t talk on the phone.

However,  in my case I was trying to get to know someone and text messaging is simply too impersonal.  Also,  it is the reason why I did not discover the mix-up.  Anyone can confuse numbers sent via text messaging, but,  if I had picked up the phone and called him,  I would’ve immediately known the difference.  In essence, text messaging and email should only be used sparingly.

I believe that text messaging and email should be used as follow-up to a conversation that happened in person, or a phone call.  Meaning,  if you meet someone and you exchange numbers, it’s okay to send a follow-up,  ”nice to meet you” text message.  Do not ask someone out through a text message/email.  And I wouldn’t advise accepting a date through a text or email.  These methods of communication are too impersonal, because, you can’t hear the person’s reaction or read their body language.

I know it seems easier, because, you don’t have to face a possible rejection or have to deliver a rejection, but, it’s not.  The sooner you learn to face possible let downs and step up to the plate to initiate a date, the better off you’ll be.  If you are interested in dating someone,  you’ll want to get to know them and the only way to do that is to talk to them face-to-face or over the phone.  This way you can hear the person’s voice or read their body language.  Using this method,  you’ll actually be better able to gauge whether or not they like you and how much.

In conclusion, although, we are a technology driven society,  the “personal touch” as author Terrie Williams once called it,  is still important.  Developing a personal relationship early on will let you know if the person is worth your time and you’ll know how compatible the two of you are.  Please learn from my mistakes and don’t strike out on a quest to get to know someone through text,  it doesn’t work. You need to hear their voice &  see them.  After all, if you find they are worth it,  you’ll not only want to hear them and see them, but,  touch and love them as well.  And you can’t achieve those emotions through text messaging or email. Think about it.