Women and Change, A Personal Perspective

This article was written by Danielle

For a child ‘change’ can be the sound of coins jiggling in grandpa’s pocket. As a young girl growing up when I heard the word ‘change’ it had something to do with older women and I wasn’t suppose to listen in on that conversation. What thoughts do you conjure up when you hear the word ‘change’? Some changes are easy to make, i.e. like choosing to eat at a different restaurant, taking a different route to work, etc. Then there are those ‘changes’ that are more difficult to implement, i.e. getting out of a bad relationship, changing careers, etc.

Change. Change is all around us. It’s going to happen with us or without us. We can make it easy or we can make it difficult. We have a choice. That’s the one great ‘given’ we have been born with; we can choose. I never gave much thought to the word ‘change’, its implication and how it applied in my daily life. After all, I just went about my day ‘doing’ what one does when one is a wife and mother. I suppose if I had been asked early on what did ‘change’ me to me I would have said something very profound like “ change is like moving from one part of the country to another” not stopping to realize that changes have been occurring all along whether I was aware of them or not. Now that I am 60 something ‘change’ has taken on a whole new aspect. I have entered into the arena of network marketing; quite a ‘change’ for someone who was a ‘stay-at-home’ mom.

I took the plunge; not giving any thought that what I was doing was a ‘change’ for me. In my mind this was going to be an exciting, fun new adventure, an opportunity to work side by side with my son, and yes, the opportunity to earn some extra income. This was all very exciting and I was willing to do anything. I had all the naivety of a first time mom. Then somewhere along the way fear, doubt, and what did I think I was doing came into being. I was beginning to experience discomfort. Procrastination was beginning to be my word for the day. The words, “I want to quit” were coming out of my mouth. But I knew deep down in my soul that that option was not possible. You see, in the year or so that I have been a network marketer my life has been transformed and the personal growth priceless. I have experienced some great mentors along this journey who have encouraged me to grow; to be coach-able, to dream, and above all be willing to change.

Through this journey I have discovered that:

Change is inevitable- It stands to reason; we are not the same as the day we were born, or even yesterday. Picture a world where everything and everyone stayed the same. Change, real change, comes from inside.
We must be willing to change. In order to change, we must change our way of thinking, our way of speaking, and our way of expressing ourselves by letting go of those old thought patterns and habits. Outer change can only occur once we release the old thought patterns and habits. As each old layer of thought or belief comes off, it is replaced with new thinking.
Change can be uncomfortable, but we do have the choice to allow this change to be exciting. Attending motivational seminars, reading books and listening to cds daily are important tools to use as well as being with like minded people. Keeping a positive attitude and a sense of humor is essential also.
When we resist change that is a clue that this is an area we must look at closely. We grow up with beliefs that fuel our resistance to change.
Resistance rears its ugly head in many ways. For example, let us look at range of ways resistance can cause change to be a challenge.

You must create the space in your life to enable your inner guide to share her wisdom, her creativity, her courage. Unleashed, she is the single most resource you have.” –Marilyn O. Sifford

In our actions: Such as wasting time and doing “busy” work
Assumptions we make of other people: I don’t want to bother them and they can’t help me
Our Beliefs: It is to expensive or It is too far to drive
Giving our power to others: My spouse won’t let me and As soon as I get______, then I’ll do it!
Limiting ideas about ourselves: I’m too old or I’m not smart enough
Fear of the unknown: I’m not ready yet and I’m not good enough

Change. I have found that ‘change’ and it has challenged me, made me cry, made me angry, frustrated me, made me laugh, brought me new friendships, taken me on new adventures and given me the resolve that I did not think I had. Change – embrace it!

Article Written by Patricia Pfenning